{"id":731,"date":"2013-02-21T15:58:04","date_gmt":"2013-02-21T22:58:04","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/josephshaub.com\/blog\/?p=731"},"modified":"2013-02-21T15:58:04","modified_gmt":"2013-02-21T22:58:04","slug":"my-two-big-beefs-part-i","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"http:\/\/josephshaub.com\/blog\/2013\/02\/my-two-big-beefs-part-i\/","title":{"rendered":"My Two Big Beefs – Part I"},"content":{"rendered":"

\"\"<\/a>There are two subjects that always make me jump on my soapbox.\u00a0 (I might even wave my hands around like the little guy here.)\u00a0<\/p>\n

First, the court’s are an atrocious<\/em> forum for resolving marital disputes.\u00a0\u00a0 After all, how are lawyers trained?\u00a0 Law school is a three-year course in “the case method” of teaching law, which is over 100 years old and still going (fairly) strong.\u00a0 In this model, students read written opinions from appeals courts and learn how to support each side.\u00a0 Our legal system is based on this “adversarial method of conflict resolution” in which each side\u00a0 promotes their side aggressively, secure in the fact that they don’t have to worry about the other side because they have their own representative promoting their side aggressively.\u00a0 Well, suffice it to say, if I were ever charged with a crime, I’d want one aggressive<\/em> individual fighting for me.\u00a0 Yet, when intimate couples fracture their relationship, the intensity of individual\u00a0vulnerability and wounding on both sides<\/em> his breathtaking.\u00a0 The triggers that caused each person to become\u00a0flooded by anger – or fear during the marital fights are no less sensitive when they commence upon the road to divorce.\u00a0 If anything, the vulnerability is even more exquisite.\u00a0 How cruel, then, to subject these poor people to the violations that are inherent in legal advocacy.\u00a0 Making the private pains public – subjecting individuals who are going through the soul-searing doubt of divorce to public revelations, criticism or outright attack is nothing short of torture.\u00a0 Adversarial lawyers speak of protecting their client’s rights.\u00a0 I would say, “protect from what?”\u00a0\u00a0 The answer can only be the other person who had been their intimate partner.\u00a0 This is the individual who has seen us at our least guarded; with whom we shared sexual intimacy and who knows our deepest fears.\u00a0 We thought this person would hold this information in trust and yet they become weapons to persuade a person in a robe to give them what they seek.\u00a0 The minute we tell someone we will “protect” them from this other person, we have created an environment of paranoia which, in most cases, can only do ill.\u00a0 Courts are a too-blunt instrument for the exquisitely sensitive task of helping people dissolve their intimate bonds.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

There are two subjects that always make me jump on my soapbox.\u00a0 (I might even wave my hands around like the little guy here.)\u00a0 First, the court’s are an atrocious forum for resolving marital disputes.\u00a0\u00a0 After all, how are lawyers trained?\u00a0 Law school is a three-year course in “the case method” of teaching law, which Continue reading →<\/a><\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":[],"categories":[44,42],"tags":[10,13,23],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"http:\/\/josephshaub.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/731"}],"collection":[{"href":"http:\/\/josephshaub.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"http:\/\/josephshaub.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/josephshaub.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/josephshaub.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=731"}],"version-history":[{"count":6,"href":"http:\/\/josephshaub.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/731\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":783,"href":"http:\/\/josephshaub.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/731\/revisions\/783"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"http:\/\/josephshaub.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=731"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/josephshaub.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=731"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/josephshaub.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=731"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}